Petition for Value

When I was 19 years old, I petitioned the leaders for an inclusive educational program to orientate me towards myself. I wasn’t qualified to make a request for such a program, but I tried anyway. I was just a student from Ballou Senior High which some say, was the worst school in DC at the time. If I told them, that my only qualification was that I was called to this world before I swam like a fish in my mother’s womb, ah, that wouldn’t have gone over too well.  My orientation in America has always been from slavery to civil rights and because of that approved historical approach; I am looked upon as having less value.

Before the age of seven I saw four men shot to death. Their lives had value, but in a community under assault since the founding of the country, that value is still a national topic. My elders and I have marched to be recognized and to have God given freedoms in this country, like to sit at a lunch counter, vote and pursue a life of full equality. Yet, we come from a community where everyone knows someone who has died from the devastating killer, AIDS. It’s a community where you know several people serving jail terms. In our community mothers cry and bury their sons in massive numbers. In this 400 hundred year old fight, we still feel we must remind people that “Black Lives Matter.”

I petitioned the leaders and asked, “Is there an orientation other than the plantation that has value?” What can we teach ourselves and the world about the children of Africa that has value? Ancestral value of any kind seems to be the missing narrative. I am a historical enthusiast by nature. So, I went to the “Book of Records”, and sought the beginning — and in the ancient testimonial account I saw the value of all the nations created by God. Even today you read about Shem’s children and Japheth’s children, and you see them today on and off the screen having great wealth. But where is the narrator that speaks of Ham’s children?

We read in the books of Shem that the Most High took one from his line and called him His own. We also read in the testimonial accounts that through Shem’s line, “…all the families of the earth will be blessed.” The ancient descendants of Shem has handed us many books as a witness of accounts. It is even written that Jesus comes from the line of Shem.

We know the great value of Japheth’s children. Every President of the United States save one was from the line of Japheth. The empire of Rome and the ancient Greeks are also from the same line. We read in the Bible, “(From these the maritime peoples spread out into their territories by their clans within their nations…)” All of the Bishops of Rome save one are from the line of Japheth. It was the maritime peoples who went forth to explore new worlds, and in that pursuit they brought my ancestors to this hemisphere. This is where the new world starts my value and education as a descendent of Ham — that orientation is a tragedy.

But I petitioned for my value and asked the leaders high and low, “Can you tell me something about my ancestors a thousand years before those ships?”

Ancient testimonial account records, “Japheth… and his sons, for their generations’ forever five great islands, and a great land in the north. But it is cold, and the land of Ham is hot, and the land of Shem is neither hot nor cold, but it is of blended cold and heat.” If you know what happens to you at the beach in the summer, then you know what happened to Ham’s children.

David writes in Psalms, “Israel entered Egypt; Jacob lived as an alien in the land of Ham.”

The ancient prophet Nahum asks, “Are you better than Thebes, situated on the Nile, with water around her? The river was her defense, the waters her wall. Ethiopia and Egypt were her boundless strength; Put and Libya were among her allies.”

I’ve never in my life saw Ethiopia and Egypt having boundless strength as a reinforced image. Where are the narrators that I may tell them of this history and my true value? In the account of Moses it says of Egypt, “But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.”

I had to read it again, God said, “… I have raised you up for this very purpose…” This was told to the nation in the hot land. Shall we show that orientation – that all of earth’s nations have truly played a wonderful part of this existence? Shall we teach our children some uplifting truth to go along with the depressing stories of oppression? Then we won’t need to tell them that “Black Lives Matter”– they would already know? I petitioned for my value and the leader’s hands were tied, but I sought and found the best historical references concerning my ancestors. I was astonished but elevated as I discovered lands rich with love, rich in gold, great in power and full of good morals — and hot with a blazing sun.

The Core of Me

As long as I can remember, I loved the sight of books. Even when I couldn’t read them, they seemed to be mystical and intimate. I used to hold them in my hand and scan the pages. I knew one day, I would learn how to read and have enough patience to enjoy a book… and I did. Now, I have an extreme thirst for books of history and it doesn’t matter whether it’s European, Asian, African or American history — I find great delight in them all.

The core of me is historically infused by nature and the solid rock of ancient testimony isThe earth's core my foundation. Whether it’s about Cyrus the Great, Maya Angelou, Xerxes — or even Josephus, who wrote, “… but others there are, who, of necessity and by force, are driven to write history, because they are concerned in the facts, and so cannot excuse themselves from committing them to writing.” Being born in America is absolutely a wonderful blessing hidden in the thickets, between the books and libraries offering infinite perspectives of lies and truths. When considering history and reading it as it relates to African Americans, it can be very depressing and confusing. On one hand, I was born in the greatest county on earth, a nation who fights for freedom all over the world; but when it comes to the history of African Americans, well –“it’s complicated.”

The backdrop to African American history is depressing. When I looked at the life of Paul Robeson, I was reading about a true genius, a man who spoke more than 20 languages. Robeson was once quoted as saying, “Equality might be denied but I knew I was not inferior.” He was a giant of a man who in ancient times would’ve been a great prince. The back drop to his life was oppression, discrimination and lynching. He was so intelligent that he didn’t toe a line for anyone and he was very aware of the power of propaganda — but played no part in it. Robeson spoke truth to power concerning pressing matters in America and the world, and for 8 years he was silenced and had his passport taken. It’s exhausting when looking at the same backdrop for many others like Malcolm X, Medgar Evers and Bessie Colman. I ask, who is responsible for this attitude and treatment, and where did it come from? It’s sickening to read about the underprivileged life pushed upon that generation of elders.

But something wonderful happened in my reading preparation. I picked up the bible and read the name Cyrus. It was the first time I was introduced to that historical name. I questioned whether or not Cyrus the Great was a real person. I discovered indeed he was, and I was excited that there was truth to the book, and for me I had a beginning point, because historically I was lost. I was so happy that the bible was not written by those who controlled Atlantic Slave Trade. It brought joy to my heart and confirmed that is was a great testimonial gift to the slave master and the slave, as neither could “add to it or subtract from it.”  Those of us from the Bantu line in America and those of us schooled with the Latin alphabet were new to the ancient testimonial account. You read from The Book of Moses, “Ham was a son of Noah and the father of Cush, Mizraim, Phut and Canaan.” Like Howard Carter and Walter Bryan Emery, I too was excited to search for information related to the hot land and its people.

It was a journey of self-discovery, a restructuring of ancient steps and maybe, just maybe I would learn why I loved hot sauce. The story of Ham and his children in the hot land is an ancient one. It was a written history long before the first ship landed in America. The stories of history are told by those in charge, but in this great and free country, I am free to search for the sight of me; I am free to pursue the happiness of me. And as I have said, the core of me has been taken over by ancient testimony and I am historically infused by nature. Here is a twist to an old African Proverb, “Because the elephant don’t have a historian the hunter is the hero.” Well, from the inspiration of the great life of Carter G. Woodson, the elephant’s historian has arrived and will tell you about the last great dinosaur walking the earth – historically speaking.

I Talked with my Mother, Moses Talked with God

The mist was in her eyes when she looked at me as we exited the court building. “You can’t keep doing this, not to you not to me. I can’t take this. I can’t, I am tired of it,” she said. I turned and looked down. I didn’t want to see her cry. I was happy to get out of there and get back to freedom. No matter the trouble my mother never left my side. She played the duel parent most of the time.

Her voice normally soft and comforting was stern as she continued, “This type of life won’t get you anywhere. It hasn’t gotten no one in our family nowhere. Who else will your sisters look up to? I need you to be an example, a positive example for them.”

I tried not to look at her, but I did, and her eyes hazed with water, struck my heart.

“I asked you to let me see you finish high school. Is that too much for you to do — to do what’s right and finish high school, is that too much!?”

I said, “No, that’s not too much.” But I had a problem, like Moses, when he said to God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh…?” I thought, who am I that I should tell my mother, I am not in school anymore? I was expelled from Eastern Senior High and she didn’t know. I was told by Eastern High, that I wasn’t fit for regular school.  I didn’t tell my mother that, so I had to try to fix it myself. I reached out to Eastern High, and asked them if I could return, but they said “no”. They offered night school as an option. I asked could I go to my neighborhood school, and they agreed only if the neighborhood school agreed. I worked on the alternative, and Ballou Senior High agreed to allow me to enroll for the next school year, but with two conditions; “I get into no trouble, what – so – ever and I join R.O.T.C.”

I went to my mother, and under self-control, I told her I had something to say and that I needed her to believe me. I said, “I messed up, I was put out of Eastern, but I am gonna finish high school, I promise; but I have to go to Ballou to do it — and I need you to sign for me. I will do what’s right and graduate.”

I couldn’t shame my mother. The least I could do was get out of high school for the woman who rubbed me with Vicks Vapor when I couldn’t breathe. She held my hand when I was a toddler and kept a roof over my head. As a teenager it was different, I was on auto pilot everyday to the streets, but now I had to retreat and slow down that type of activity. ROTC was like kryptonite to me and some of my friends, but it helped and was a humbling experience that introduced me to military order.

I told my mother I would graduate and I promised her that. In order for me to do that I shut myself down — and it was extreme. When I was informed about the parties, I said “no”, when I was briefed about the women, I said “no thank you”, and when I was told about the drug shipments coming in, I was invisible.

My reading level measured a few fingers on one hand and I was in the 11th grade – go figure. In my isolation I started practicing to read. I picked up the Bible, and not only did my reading improve but a whole universe of kingdoms and writers opened up and I couldn’t get enough. Like the story of the conversation between God and Moses. When God first spoke to Moses, this story was the gateway to me understanding the power of history.   It’s written that “Moses saw that the bush was on fire and it did not burn up.” It continues that when God saw he had gone over to look, He called his name. And God introduced Himself as the “God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob.”

Moses is the #1 author of all time, the most read of all the authors in the world. And he writes, that God said, “…I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt.” And what Moses writes next blows my mind. He asks God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” He questions the Most High, about going to Pharaoh and I thought that was amazing for so many reasons. Who is this Pharaoh I thought, that Moses feels hesitant to go before him.

For perspective, here is a little something from Pharaoh. He writes thus, “Hekamaatre, the son of Re, lord of crowns, like Horus of the horizon, Ramses, given life, like Re eternally. The king of Upper and Lower Egypt, lord of the two lands, Hekamaatre, son of Re, lord of crowns, Ramses, given life like Re has said: I was wise in my heart… It is a written text and not an oral tradition, and the living count in order to know the day and the month to add the one to the other and know the span of their life.” These writings were translated from what the ancient Greeks call sacred writings. The Egyptian Empire was a great nation more than two thousand years before Moses was born. So, it is in this context that God’s conversation with Moses is so amazing.

Moses says to God, “O my Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” When I read that, I thought, that’s me “never been eloquent, slow speech and tongue.” And if Moses can end up being the # 1 author of all time, then not only could I get out of High School, but I could do much more.  Then Moses just flat out says to God, “O Lord, please send someone else to do it.”

So, as I began to change, it was with the help of the book many call the Bible, and the stories that lie within, that almost single handedly took my interest from the streets to a Ballou Senior High graduate. And it all started by the mist that formed to a tear from my mother’s eyes.